Crutch pt 6

Yes my wonderful friends. It is time for another installment of Crutch. Who is ready for more? I have seen that people have stopped by and some people have left comments and I appreciate it. I love getting input, your points of view and just help in general. So for those of you who help me, I really, really, really appreciate you!!

Okay, now to the saga of Tess and Aaron.

 Aaron grabbed Tess by the hair and helped her to her feet, not minding her wincing in pain. He jerked her upright to face him as she struggled with her hands to get his free from her entangled mess of hair.

     “Not so fast, where are you off to Contessa?” She could hear the laughter in his voice. He was amused by her struggle to get free. She quickly stopped and stood motionless. Anticipating what he would do next. “Was that better love?”

     She starts to sob. Don’t let him do this. Stand your ground. You can do this. The inhalation of air was forceful enough to help stifle the cry. She bit hard into her lip and laughed again…at him. “Is that the best you can do?”

     Aaron didn’t like being made a fool of and this really pissed him off. Why wasn’t she crying? “What the hell are you laughing about? You think this is funny?”  He shook her violently, attempting to shake the laughter from her lungs.

     Tess continued to test his patience with her defiance. Aaron brought her face up close to his so that he could look her in the eye. Look for the fear that he so desperately needed to feed from. Her eyes met his and she held his gaze and he caught the small flicker he preyed upon.

     His had come sudden and hard as a stone across her right cheek before she had time to counter. She cried out in pain, reflexively covering her face with her hands waiting for another blow.

     “You should know better than to provoke me bitch.” His voice blared.

     Tess knew that this was her chance and she needed to take it. With her hands still covering her face and his hands still holding her arms, she quickly brought her knee up to his groin as forcefully as she could manage.

     Aaron doubled over in pain, hands mechanically reaching for his scrotum that were suffering from the blunt trauma. Once he released her she ran as fast as she could through the house and out to the car. She climbed inside and locked the doors and reached for the ignition. Her keys were gone.

For those who are just stumbling along this and are new to this series, I have added a page at the top for you to go to in order to start from the beginning. Thank you for your support!!

Crutch pt 5

     Aaron paused for a short second  before his face release a little like he was transforming back to Jekyll. The force of his hands pinching her upper arms started to ease up a little and he looked at his hands.

     Tess’ heart thumped harder in her chest thinking that maybe he would release her and they would have a normal fight and it would be distinguished easier than she imagined. Her eyes were trained on his face watching every expression intensely.

     He looked at his hands on her arms and then looked at her face. She stopped breathing for a moment but her body was trembling beneath his touch. He searched her face for answers and saw a small glint of fear in her eyes. That was all it took.

     Aaron’s grip tightened once again and before Tess could think about it he whirled her around the room, throwing her toward the closet. She slid across the floor, hitting her back and her head in the center of the door.

     The full length mirror shattered as she slumped to the ground and rained down on Tess cutting her cheek as it fell. The blood seeped down toward her mouth as she gasped for air to replace what was knocked from her upon impact.

     Her mind was telling her to get up but her body was riveting in pain and she could hear him walking toward her. The shards of the mirror crunching under his boots as he slowly approached her and then stopped. The toe of his boot directly in front of her face.

     Tess reluctantly waited for it to strike her in the face, but nothing happened. Another ragged breath entered her aching lungs and she coughed as she tried to regain a full breath. Aaron knelt down in front of her with his elbows on his knees, rocking back on his heels.

     He swiped some of the blood from her cut and smeared it across her face. “What a fucking waste. You used to be pretty you know. Now what am I going to do with you?”

Crutch pt 4

    Another attempt at bravery and defiance was when she turned to walk away from him and toward the dresser to start collecting some of her own items. She had taken five steps and opened a drawer and then he was on her. Aaron had her by the arm and swung her around to face him and then slammed her against the wall.

     Her first thought was how bad her head hurt after it ricocheted off the plaster and lathe wall and how she couldn’t believe she was letting this happen. Fear started to take over and she felt it over-coming her body, she started to tremble.

     His eyes were glossed over and she knew he was Hyde tonight. Once he felt her shaking under his grasp the look of satisfaction took over. A sinister smile christened his lips and then reached his eyes.

     Tess was overwhelmed with confusion of how she was going to get out of the house. She just kept his eye contact and then began to laugh. His eyes narrowed and his look of amusement became a scowl. He couldn’t believe she was laughing about this.

     “Is that all you got?” She mumbles though her laughter.

     “Do you want me to do worse?” He grip tightens on her arms with every word.

 

     The only thing Tess could think to do was mock him and raised her eyebrows with an oh yeah, what do you got? She knew this was not in her best interest but did it anyway. She dared herself as much as him.

     Calling him out to unleash more anger on her was a plan to see if she could get him to release her. If he loosened his grip, she could possibly run. Get back to the car and get the hell out of there.

My Ground Hog’s Day Spectacular…with 50 First Dates!

Have you ever felt like you are trapped in the same day – everyday and that there is no escaping it?  I have. It is not always the same day everyday…most of it is the same—just small variations make adjustments of the outcome.

If you have every watched Bill Murray in “Ground Hog’s Day”, you may have been amused…even laughed a couple times or through the entire movie. I wish that it were that simple to laugh about.

*DEEP BREATH*

For those of you who are not familiar with my life, let me explain to you that my husband was injured three years ago in a construction accident. He was hit in the head (while wearing a hard hat – thank goodness!) with a 9 foot steel beam that fell 12 feet.

They diagnosed him with TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury). He suffers from continuous pain that is sort of like a migraine, short term memory issues, behavior issues, and blanks out to where he sort of spaces out and walks around and ends up in places that he does not remember going. This has resulted in him not being able to hold a job or drive. Plus they just told us this is all permanent and he is unfixable.

So when I say Ground Hog’s Day that relates to his short term memory. If you have ever watched “50 First Dates” with Drew Barrymore and Adam Sandler…then understand that he is my Drew. Once he goes to bed, the slate wipes clean and we start over. He is supposed to keep a journal so that he knows what happened, but doesn’t always do that. So for those of you who have had a marital spat…try having the same one three days in a row because your husband forgot that you told him something or forgot that you already had that fight.

Things have been hard on us for awhile now with this work related injury alone…but I must keep going because we have five children. Two are his, two are mine and one if ours together. His daughter lives with her mother and the other four live with us. Well that was up until two months ago. My 16 year old daughter moved out and moved in with her father because she couldn’t be in the same house with my husband’s behavior issues or lack of good behavior. This broke my heart but I am dealing thinking that the medications that they are giving my husband will eventually help him and we will get him in a good place. In the mean time…I miss my daughter terribly.

One minute he is supportive of my writing, the next he is tearing the internet satellite out of the ground with the tractor…so for those of you that I was beta reading for—it is not that I was trying to slack—I love the work you are doing and it is all brilliant and hope that you send me more. I just had to start trying to squeeze things in on my lunch hours and at breaks at work. I even got an iPhone with internet…

I can come home and if he is bored from staying home he will rip a room apart to be remodeled and then I am stuck with cleaning up a mess and spending all of my free time redoing a room. So he is a box of chocolates because you never know what you are going to get when you go home. He could be nice, sweet, loveable, bitter, jealous, rude…basically my own Jekyll and Hyde.  So if there are any of you out there that have a loved one that is suffering with a traumatic brain injury, you are not alone. I know how you feel and may know what you go through.

So when I say I am muddling through…that is what I am trying to do. So tell me my wonderful faithfuls that keep me motivated and that I adore very much…have you ever had anything that you would call your groundhog’s day or even have the same dream over and over again?

Of course you know this is why I have so many raw emotions to use in my writing and so many ideas. Writing is my escape and it has saved me more times than I can count. It keeps me sane.

Deadly Sin # 5…Wrath

Wrath…anger…rage – may be described as inordinate and uncontrolled feelings of hatred and anger. Anger in its purest form, present s with self-destructiveness, violence, and hate that may provoke feuds that can go on for centuries. Feelings of anger can manifest in different ways, including  impatience, revenge, and vigilantism.

What has made you unleash your wrath? Have there been moments where it has been there lying under the surface, just waiting to come out from hiding? Yes, I have been guilty once again of another sin...anger. I have had anger creep up on me and have had to find a way to defuse it. Anger is not a good feeling to have. It is not a pleasant sensation to radiate…permeate through your body and mind.

It is like being possessed by something evil and not realizing it until it has left your body. Have you been possessed by anger before? Are you a Jekyl and Hyde?